Addictions, Annulment, Church, Feelings, Me, True Life

Church Service Generated Emotions

Church was rough last night.  It brought back memories and feelings I am trying to suppress.

 I have a problem with churches telling us to confront a sister/brother in Christ who is sinning and/or to continue until it is rectified.  They are creating a world of people who believe they are better then others.  Unless, you are talking about The Ten Commandments, what one considers a ‘sin’ is not always the same.  Reporting people, can lead to anger and hurt,as well as, stay with someone for a long time.  

 I really miss D. I seriously wonder how I am doing this every day.  I miss our love and the fun we had and I miss how safe I felt…at First.   But, I also want to smack the shit out of him!  

How dare he put drugs before our marriage and happiness!  How dare he omit telling me about some of the lowest times of his life and unlock the door to go back to smoking pot while married to me!  How dare he not try to fight to save his marriage when he had the chance and refuse to get help for his addiction! 

 When will my heart, soul and mind heal?When will this emotional and mental pain end?  Just some thoughts that were generated from last nights church service.

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